Firstly, I’d like to apologise for being rather rubbish at blogging these past few weeks. I’ve been feeling super unmotivated and overrun with uni work, but I thought I’d update you all on my mental health journey.
So if you read my previous posts (here and here), you will know that I FINALLY reached out and got help regarding my anxiety and depression. I was diagnosed with chronic anxiety, panic disorder and low moods. Although expected, it was still completely overwhelming to actually be told I was mentally ill.
I was prescribed Sertraline, something that I was rather sceptical about. I didn’t know how or whether it would work and I was pretty negative about the whole idea. But I knew I needed it.
I’ve been on 50mg of Sertraline for the past month and I won’t lie to you, it’s been rocky. I’ve never felt so ill. For the first couple of weeks I had constant migraines, I felt like I was going to throw up 99.9% of the time and when I ran to the bathroom to be sick, I was so dizzy that I fell over. It seemed to make me more anxious at first and I’ve had like a 3 week-long period (TMI, sorry). If I take a pill slightly late, the withdrawal symptoms start almost instantly. But, it’s not all bad.
I’m happier. I’m sleeping. God, for the first time in months and months, I’m sleeping. No nightmares, no over thinking, no panic attacks. Anxiety is still there and I still have bad days. But it’s not everyday. I can actually live a normal day-to-day life, without anxiety punching me straight in the face.
I had a check up appointment this morning and the doctor prescribed another month of 50mg. She said that next month, she would like to up my dose to 100mg – which, I won’t complain about.
I also referred myself to a therapist this afternoon, which I would have never done this time last month. I’m extremely nervous, but open-minded and looking forward to getting stuck in.
If this past month has taught me anything, it’s that no matter how bad things get – it will get better. Asking for help is nothing to be ashamed about.